The start of something new.

I have a very interesting life.

My family: My dad is the American Dream story. My mom is fabulously wonderful to me. My sister Linda has taken responsibility over me since I was born and is a PA at a hospital and in love with her daughter Sunflower. My sister Nancy is my twin, born 7 years ahead of me. Almost everything she does, I want to do. My sister Mary is so funny, thoughtful and absolutely, 100% weird. :) My CPA brother-in-law Eric is a total nerd and my brother-in-law Nathan is a total freak. It's wonderful. Sunny is the first born dog who is the sweetest garbage eater alive. Cherokee is a gynormous greyhound with a baby personality and is a huge cuddle bug. Spirit is a hunter/gatherer who loves to be loved and is a sweety pie. Ashley is me in a Wisconsin-girl-I-watch-stupid-tv-shows-like-So-You-Think-You-Can-Dance form. :) She listens to every word I say and lifts my heart. Katrina has been there since I was a little kid and is someone I very much look up to. I'm naming one of my kids after her, assuming its a girl...and Zach is the oddest, most outrageous guy I know that I could not live my life without.

I love baseball. I cannot play it for the life of me but I'd like to practice and eventually get better. I watch the Twins on a daily basis and follow their standings to make sure Chicago doesn't get a big head and try to beat us. And by daily basis I mean when they play, which I am fully aware of.

Yoga has changed my life. When I was stuck in a rut and at the lowest point I've ever experienced, yoga brought me back to life. I started doing it in St. Paul with my brother-in-law and eventually felt better and stopped doing it, almost like it was therapy. Then, when I went to Hong Kong, I was totally involved in it and went to a super fancy studio multiple times a week. My balance has improved. My mind has become more calm. Something awoke in me and I'm thankful for it.

Chinese is the next passion I have. As a Chinese girl with a Vietnamese cultural upbringing, living in America, I thought I should have known all of the languages my parents speak. However, I became a little more white-washed than I should have and learning a foreign tongue didn't strike me as appealing. Now that I have grown up and seen how amazing culture is and how cool it is that I am Chinese/Vietnamese/American, I have been learning Chinese. I speak it on a daily basis with my mom and will forever learn it and teach it to my kids.

I like to make things. I am an old grandma in that I love, love to scrapbook, make cards, send cards, and keep correspondence with people.

I like to travel. I just spent 5 months overseas studying in Hong Kong, but roaming all of SE Asian and it has definitely done a number on my eyes. It sounds so cliche, but really, life is good here when you see how awful it is for other people. Not even just that, but I have learned so much about how people around the world behave, what they like, what they think about the world, etc. There is no way to get this from a book or a class. You must go discover. (I realize not everyone has this opportunity, and for that, I am grateful).

I live on a lake. I've come to appreciate nature much more than I ever have before. I love to watch the sunset every evening and I like to look at the waves of the lake.

I love to read. I read mystery books just for the heck of it but I read non-fiction to learn about business, the economy, and the overall state of the world. I love to learn. I thrive on it. I don't always like to do homework, read textbooks, or take tests...but I love education!!

So those are my passions right now as a 21-year-old American-Chinese-Vietnamese girl living in the suburbs with her parents over the summer.

But that is the sunshine, butterflies and rainbows side of me...and sometimes it feels like it rains a lot in my life.

I have had a lot of things happen to me that are unfortunate and I would never wish them on anyone. Some were completely out of my control, some have had a lot to do with my actions or thoughts/words...and some I don't know how the hell they appear in my life, but they just do.

I've gone through some trauma. I've gone through heartache. I've seen death way too much (and yes, I am afraid of it). I've made huge mistakes. I've been treated wrong. I've stopped talking to people.

High school is what is getting me right now. I don't know why I still care about it though. I feel that I am above stooping to a similar level that they are at, but still my heart sinks when I realize what has happened. I had a great time in high school. I had a few relationships that all ended poorly, but when it came down to it, I had the time of my life. I went to every hockey game because Katrina and I were superfans. I was obsessed with football and Friday night games. I took part in a lot of things, was involved, got really great grades and loved my life.

Now that high school is over, I have moved on. I am in college. My friends are in college and act like it. But some don't. They talk about me, make up lies about me, don't believe me when I never ever lie. I have never felt so horrible as people that I have known since I was a little girl have made me feel. I shouldn't let people make me feel this way, but hey, I am human.

That's the thing about growing up. You make friends in college because you want to be their friend, not because you both go to the same school and you live in the same city and hey, that girl is having a birthday party and you will both be there. Not so. You share values, you have fun, you respect each other and love each other. That is what real friendship is. I have been so lucky to meet some of those people over the past three years, and as we go on to our last year of college, I still know that we will be best friends even after it is over.

I don't know how to deal with the people I have known since forever. On one hand, I want to completely ignore them and erase them from my memory and my current life. On the other hand, I think...what a waste of so many years of my life to have that all slip away when I am an adult. But what do I do?

Anyway, to wrap things up, this is who I am right now. There are good things about me. There are bad things about me. I have a lot of love in my life. I have a lot of drama in my life. I believe in peace. I don't believe in hate. I believe people are good, they are showing me otherwise.

Life can be the most beautiful thing. It can also be the most unnerving.